The WAHTMM Weekly // The Breasties Newsletter

"Remember the places that shaped you.
Remember the landscapes that have been your teachers.
Remember everything you learned.
And remember to pass it on."
MHN.

We are BIG fans of the queen Morgan Harper Nichols and this quote is at the heart of all we do here at The Breasties. For many of us, we have had to navigate our surgeries and diagnosis on our own, only to find this community after.

The power in that is the ability to share all that we have learned with those who are newly diagnosed so they don't have to go through this or make the same difficult decisions feeling alone or uninformed. We believe that our combined willingness to open our hearts and share our experiences in what makes our community so strong.

Just last week, our incredible mountain movers Janaé and Tash talked about giving ourselves grace, in their health and wellness chat.

Janaé gave us this piece of advice, "try not to focus on trying to get your body back to what it was before you were diagnosed but focus on what can my body be after all it has gone through and learn to love and appreciate it for where it is now and not comparing it to where it once was or where we want it to be."

Tash shared, "I hate that the term "new normal" is only brought up after a diagnosis because our bodies actually go through a "new normal" every 2-3 years. Our bodies are constantly changing and we constantly have to find what works for us!"

If you missed this chat - you can head to our IGTV to watch it now!

M.E. and Staci shared about being queer in the breastie community and how that has impacted their medical experiences.

M.E. shares, "because I am queer and I exist in a queer community, breasts and nipples and scars and all the versions of a top that you can have are talked about. Scars and numbness are openly talked about. I currently have expanders, no nipples and huge scars and I have never for a second felt like that changed my gender. I think doctors make it seem like if we go through this we will be deemed as less than a woman and it's just so beyond wild because to have a doctor say something like that is so shocking."

Staci added, "I have had to go through five different reconstruction surgeries - and that sucked - and it still hurts - and some of that is because of radiation, but never once was I offered the option of an aesthetic flat closure and it was explained because I am "young." Me being young has nothing to do with how I want to present myself. While I like how I look in clothes, maybe I would have been happier if I was offered the choice of an aesthetic flat closure and wasn't pressured into reconstruction."

If you missed this chat - you can head to our IGTV to watch it now!

We hope that our weekly Community Conversations and Meetups help empower you to learn, to share and help you feel less alone.

You can find all of our LIVE events and meetups for this week listed below. If you would like to join us as a guest speaker for an upcoming event - please let us know.

Sending you love breasties.

Thank you for helping us move mountains!

WAHTMM,
The Breasties

@damngoodyoga on pain being temporary:

"Pain is temporary. Read that again and say it out loud. Pain is temporary.

Whatever it is that you are going through, it has an end date. Even if you can’t see that now. Even if the pain is so great it takes your breath away. Even if you want to curl into a tiny ball and vanish from this spinning playground. It has an end. I promise you, this too shall pass. As long cold Monday winter mornings turn into Saturday spring al fresco afternoons, you will bloom from the torturous heavy into the newness of light."

@robinista on celebrating being done with chemo:

“Breast cancer, with its mortal awareness and the amputation which it entails, can still be a gateway, however cruelly won, into the tapping and expansion of my own power and knowing. “ - Audre Lorde

Someone in these pics just finished chemo! My war isn’t finished but I’m celebrating winning this battle. Pain, nausea, fatigue, itching, tears -I can’t even begin to describe how much I hated this. Working full time to make sure I’m keeping a roof over my head while battling side effects and trying to throw on a wig and some brows for Zoom 😭. OVER IT. But thanks be to God, I’m still here, still fighting and no plans to change that!

@ahotms on feeling sexy after your mastectomy:

"𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙨𝙚𝙭𝙮 𝙖𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙨 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙣 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙮𝙤𝙪? ⁣
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It’s not an easy transition to handle. ⁣
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It took me a while to get reacquainted with myself again. To accept myself. To admire my new body. To embrace expressing myself again. To really feel sexy. ⁣
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A woman can put on lacy pjs and blow dry her hair and still not feel sexy. It has to come within her. The fire that burns in her core that emulates the Phoenix within her. Strength. Confidence. Power. Love. Grounding. ⁣
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𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙎 is what makes a woman feel sexy. Then add in some new Victoria’s Secret and bam. She’s feeling it. ⁣
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We can’t put a cap on what we feel is acceptable as sexy. There are no limits. No boundaries. No rules to follow. We lead with our heart. We listen to our instincts. We unleash our beauty for all the world to see and we learn to really truly love ourselves. ⁣
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Today i think is the first day in a while I’ve felt sexy and I’m loving it!"

@high_horse_studio self portrait:

"I am not afraid to show you my trauma, although the world tells me I should be. I will not cover up my pain in a pink ribbon. I would rather defy the images of smiling, racing women high-fiving their supporters as sign up for the next triathlon. I’m sick of the trite memes about cancer-thriving and how beautiful my scars are.

It is true that I survived. I endured. And I celebrate that. But I don’t see conventional beauty in this mutilated body. No, those scars remind me of scalpels and shower stools and suppositories and so much sadness.

But why are we so quick to deny our suffering in front of others? Or even be honest with ourselves about it?

Why are we so completely OBSESSED with being OKAY when things are most definitely not okay? Why do I find myself trying to put a positive spin on every single last wretched thing that has happened over the last nearly 3 years?

Because we’re all still suckers for happy endings. Who wants to see a sad story without one? Challenges are supposed to come with life lessons. Difficulties define our values. Right? What use is this all if I don’t walk away with some new philosophical outlook on life and gratitude oozing from my mouth as I stand at the top of the mountain.

Pain is so much more palatable when it comes in a cute package, wrapped up tastefully and tidy, topped with some sort of meaningful bow. Plain suffering, grieving, losing….these things are icky and un-Insta-inspiring. It’s uncomfortable, even when you’re looking at your own reflection.

But today is #WorldCancerDay. And today, I feel tired and sad and everything hurts. It hurts to remember, but it hurts more to forget. I was quite literally cut open only 3 weeks ago. Am I at the end of this JoUrNeY? Maybe, but it’s never going to be over. Something will always be picking at the scabs. Reopening the wounds. Going back to the place where the violence happened.

It’s part of our continuing story. So is treatment and hair loss and physical therapy. Getting the best news. But sometimes the worst. It’s not pretty or tidy.

Some days seem full of meaning. Other days are just days.

That’s #lifeaftercancer too."

@livandlet.ttbc on setting up a hub to support those affected by breast cancer:

"My name is Lauren Lopriore, I am a stay-at-home mom to a two year old, a breast cancer survivor and now a budding entrepreneur.

In 2019, I started “Liv & Let”- Thriving Through Breast Cancer (LivandLet.com).

This was four years after I was diagnosed with stage 3 triple positive breast cancer. After not having a lot of resources at my fingertips, fighting cancer with a very small support team and later on becoming a support for friends who had been diagnosed with cancer, I decided it was time to share my story and talk about being a young adult cancer survivor and set up a hub to support those affected by breast cancer.

Liv & Let is centralized information hub and nurture shoppe for the previvor, survivor, caretaker and support system as they enter the real life journey of a breast cancer diagnosis. I am dedicated to giving strength and hope to those affected by cancer.

By nurturing and providing comprehensive knowledge, the hope is to give emotional, mental and physical support as well as essential items to thrive through treatment and survivorship."